Elbert Ainstein

We bought Will an Albert Einstein Funko Pop for his birthday. Before opening it, he shook it, turned it around in his hands, listened to the package, and declared he knew what it was. We asked him how he could be so sure. He remarked that the Albert Einstein edition was the only Funko Pop […]

The Soothing Sounds of My 38-Inch Cutting Deck

I got a new day gig in the Midwest. This gig will bring us closer to our family roots and closer to real estate prices that feel grounded in reality, rather than high up in the coke-filled clouds of a subprime speculator’s drug-fueled wet dream. With cheaper real estate comes the ability to get more […]

Bonne Nuit Routine

I was super tired and trying to pick things up downstairs before going up to bed, so I grabbed my wallet and stuffed it into my left back pocket. I always put it into either my right back or right front pocket, never the left. Thus, everything felt wrong. Drinking may have played a part. […]